Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Day 05: Something in life that gives me balance

Gee, this isn't an easy topic. I'm not sure I know what is meant by "balance", unless it is "that which keeps you from losing your mind".


My life has always been a bit topsy-turvy with a splash of turmoil thrown in for good measure. There were years when "losing my mind" was pretty damned close to reality. I had problems. Ones that I recognized and others that I didn't. I was my own worst enemy. I ruined friendships, relationships and jobs.


It wasn't until I married, had kids and divorced that I finally got the help I needed. Through counseling and medication, I became someone that I finally liked. Through counseling, I learned the origins of my problems and that I was taking it all out on myself by maintaining anger and by reliving the past. I was giving those who hurt me early in life permission to continue hurting me long afterwards. 


It wasn't a quick fix, by any means. It took years and years to overcome. Writing became one of my best ways of coping, of talking myself through things without internalizing them. Over time, I have become a different person than I used to be. Far from perfect, but also far from that fractured shell I used to be. 



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1 Comments:

Blogger KAT said...

It takes a lot of courage to seek help when we need it. Congratulations on taking that step!

May 8, 2012 at 6:26 PM  

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